JOEL - The number of children a couple has is a very personal and private thing between the husband and wife and God. It all depends on the health of both parents and on the inspiration they receive from God on what is best for their situation.
Is there any place in the Church for people who choose not to have children?
Yes, in our ward it is the second row from the back on the right side of the Chapel :-)
It's hard to make judgments on things that people say about this. People who act as in your daughter's expereince, are usually just displaying their own insecurities about their own lives and choices. The most important thing for us is how we choose to respond to the stupid things people sometimes do and say. It will never stop, so we need to develope and maintain an attitude of Christlike love and acceptance for everyone regardless of what they do or say to us (I know. Easier said than done).
Jesus said:
"But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; " (Matt 5:44)
Those who follow this councel will have peace in their lives regardless of what happens to them.
It's interesting that the older we get the more we tend to forget what it was like to try and keep 5 or 6 children quiet and reverent in a long church meeting (me included). Just last week in church a young mother(whose husband is currently serving in the military) was having a little trouble with her 4 young kids. They were getting restless and noisy and it was starting to anoy people(including me) and disrupt the meeting. But then another sister got up from where she was sitting and in a very kind manner went over and sat with the kids to help calm them down. Who was the good neighbor? The ones shooting angry anoyed glances towards the young mother, or the one who went over and helped her?
I guess the bottom line in all I have said is that you can't judge the Church or the Gospel based on what some of us weak imperfect mortals do. A testimony of the gospel is based on faith and a witness from the Holy Ghost and the love we feel from God for the blessings He gives us.