October 2001
A vital part of loving is listening. I know what listening really is, because I have had the blessed experience.
I used to farm with my dad. I didn't always enjoy it, but when lunchtime came we'd sit in the shade of the tall poplar trees, eat our lunch, and talk. My dad didn't use this as a golden teaching moment to lay down the law and straighten out his daughter. We just talked;about anything and everything.
This was the time I could ask questions. I felt so safe I could even ask questions that might provoke him. I remember asking him, "Why did you embarrass me in front of my friends last week when I had stayed out too late and you came and got me?"
His answer leads to another aspect of love. He wasn't being arbitrary. There were certain standards of behavior I was expected to live. He said, "Having you out late worried me. Above all, I want you safe." I realized his love for me was stronger than his desire for sleep or the inconvenience of getting dressed and driving down the road looking for me.

Consistent leading helps youth make wise choices, and our trust in them increases.
I remember when I was about 16 years old overhearing Mom talking to Dad. She was concerned about some choices I was making. I was not guilty of any sin more serious than the immaturity of youth, but Mom was worried. What Dad said seared into my heart. "Don't worry," he said to Mom. "I trust Sharon, and I know she'll do the right thing." Those hours in the hayfield paid off then and there. From that moment on I was bound to those loving, trusting parents.